Wednesday, December 31, 2014


(It's nature that made man and woman different in communication.)

In societies where language is more developed/more rich, the women's needs would be more taken care of, because women use language as a potent tool more than men; women spend their energies in communication; men in action.
The purpose of asking questions in women is to quench their thirst of curiosity or for change; also to get details and to start/sustain conversations.
For women, conversations are the essential tools for relationship building and maintenance, also for emotional communication, exchanges, assurances and reassurances, for sharing emotions,evolving their EQ and reinforcing bonds of friendship. As EQ is high in women, connections are made at emotional level during conversations.
Through a conversation a woman is seeking compassion and care, sharing a concern, reinforcing bonds, understanding and interacting with emotional aspect/side of an issue/person and not much dealing with the intellectual aspect/side of an issue/person. 
What a woman needs is emotional support for her concerns/issues/problems.
Women require and crave for affection, proximity, respectful behaviour, dignity, support, acknowledgement and recognition. Security is a big issue/concern for women, so she needs encouragement, support, and a show of courage. Men need to use the language of emotion that touches her heart, provides solace and peace, give a touch of security; in short she should get a feeling of security through a person's actions and behavior.
A woman is seeking not a man of solutions/advice but a good listener who can make her comfortable and secure while interacting, who can be an emotional partner.
So your suggestions/ideas should be introduced not as solutions but rather they should appear to her as insights coming naturally to someone on a path to exploring/discovering her emotional self through interpersonal communication. So just show her the perspective, the right way to see something; don't give opinions or judgments. Help her to form opinions and judgments on her own.
Nagging in women is an act of sharing and communicating and criticising/complaining/grumbling/disturbing. The intention behind nagging is to share emotions, feelings and problems.
Men prefer escapism, evasion from their emotional self which is not a good strategy in the long run. It's suicidal. Men should learn from women to share their anxieties, emotions rather than getting burnt inside. "Mard ko dard nahi hota" as they say in Hindi which means a real man has no pain. In reality he keeps the pain inside and explodes one day.
Men feel the most vulnerable when they are required to show their real emotions; emotional expressions like happiness/fear/sadness/disappointment/hope etc. The communication between men and women should take place in an emotional language and not informational/intellectual/creative/spiritual.
Men need to acquire the skill of emotional communication. They should rise in emotional communication, not fall. It is adopting/discovering/exploring their emotional side/aspect/self in communication; looking at feelings also and not always searching for a meaning in issues or things.


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